The church is sick. I am not immune to this disease, nor is anyone else, and claiming to be apart from it is just another symptom.
Now- I could go on to talk about the disease of sugar-coated Christianity, of dismissing the sin of homosexuality, of de-emphasizing the truth of the holy, pure Word of God. I could outline the evils of abortion and how terrible it is that we label murder as women's rights, of placing too much importance on tradition, or of hypocrisy in church leadership, or religious complacency. I could rant on and on about those things, but what I want to write tonight isn't about church politics or denominational differences. It's about the hearts of Christians.
I want you to paint a picture in your minds right now of a church sanctuary. You are in front of the church and a little off to the side, singing on the worship team. There are 200 church members standing in front of you, looking up at a large projector screen, moving their mouths.
Here's what is going through your head:
"I was flat on that last note. I have to support my singing more. Oh, I wonder if anyone noticed that I started singing the wrong verse just there. Oh, focus- God, you truly are enough for me... That woman in the back row looks really spaced out. I bet she doesn't even realize she's supposed to be singing. Why are some people not even moving their mouths? We've done this song a thousand times..... Oh yeah, the words- God will provide for us. You're enough for me, God... That song went pretty good overall I think."
Is this how God intended worship to be? Standing together in a room, singing songs about God's love but not really hearing the words. Thanking Jesus for what he's done without actually feeling any gratitude. Is this all that is required of us? Half-heartedly going through the motions and at the same time thinking that we're good people for at least going to a church regularly? It's... well honestly, there's not a word to describe how disgusted I am by this. Even more so because this disease of the self has progressed so far in my own life.
This verse is absolutely what I'm talking about here. Take a minute to reflect on what it's saying. Isaiah 29:13 "The Lord says, (think about that, GOD is speaking here. When God speaks, things happen. The ruler of the universe had this recorded so that everyone in the world could hear it.) 'These people come near me with their mouths and honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. Their worship of me is made up only of rules taught by men.'"
Rules taught by men. For example, rules like- worship is sincere when you let go of all your worries and lift your hands to God- that's how everyone will know you're being sincere. Or a rule that says- you can worship on your own in your house, but you have to also come together with other believers to worship in a church. Or- you have to sing the words of a song to worship. Or... you have to resolve the problems in your heart and in your life before you can truly worship God.
I'm not saying those rules can't apply to someone's worship, but really, THEY DON'T MATTER. Worship can be happy or solemn. Worship can cause you to dance in celebration, or it can bring you to your knees. While you worship you might cry tears of joy, or tears of conviction and brokenness. You can't put worship in a box any more than you can fit the wonderful works of God on a single sheet of paper.
How then, are we to worship together at all? What is the role of worship leaders?
I can't answer those questions. Maybe no one can, but if you feel you have an answer, please share. Because to my understanding, there is NOTHING we can do to help someone worship. I could jump around for days with my hands in the air, pouring my heart out to God, and have no effect whatsoever on a group of teens watching me. I could fall to the ground in reverence of the Lord and be reduced to tears as I sing of my Savior's love, all the while a girl in the second row of church feels convicted for a moment, but by the time she joins in the praises, her mind has wandered to all the times she's messed up in front of friends. And even if a group of people were to succeed in being reflective and contemplative about their lives, thinking about their sins and how God has saved them, it's another step entirely for them to be talking to God, connected to Him and thanking him for this mercy.
Another aspect of this is the fact that good intentions can sometimes lead to huge failures. We're learning about the puritans in school, and though our teachers talk a lot about what was wrong with the Puritan Separatist society, I often find myself understanding their point of view. The Puritans wanted to get to the heart of worship, to take away all the extra traditions and distractions in the church, and just FOCUS ON GOD. They wanted to create a world of Christians who were grounded and motivated to share the gospel with everyone. But they failed, because they forgot about forgiveness, they put too much pressure on each other to be good people, and they took all the joy out of church. It's not a very good witness to nonchristians to be serious ALL the time. On the other hand, it's not an effective witness to be happy all the time and never reflect on our shortcomings (and God's provision through them).
I'm coming back to the heart of worship, and it's all about you. It's all about you, Jesus.
Are we supposed to smile when we worship God? What even is worship? Some would say worship is praise. It is telling God how amazing and wonderful he is. Others would say it's just talking to God through an action- singing, dancing, playing a sport for the glory of God- saying, "This is for you, Father." Maybe you think worship is just basking in the presence of God. On bible gateway, there are 250 passage results in the NIV bible for the keyword, "worship."
Psalm 100:2 Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.
Hebrews 12:28 Therefore, since we are recieving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our "God is a consuming fire."
We are told so many things to feel when we worship. Feel reverent, feel awestruck, feel joyful, feel free, feel thankful. I'm not entirely sure, but I think that if I felt all those things at one time, I'd literally just break down and cease to feel any of those, instead feeling very confused and inadequate.
What is worship? How do we "worship God acceptably?"
It's not a matter of appearance, whether reserved or totally undignified. It's solely a matter of the heart.
